Revelations and Books :)

I had dinner with a really good friend today. It's funny cause the people you meet in your life really are put there for a reason. You see I met this friend through an ex boyfriend, and i thought of course as usual as other friends of boyfriends, that they will be merely just that, you won't think that you'll hang out with them or they'll genuinely be your friends as is, but God does do everything for a reason. and I gotta say I'm fortunate for this friend. Lol just had to put that out their as random jumble, cause it came to my head before i get started on my other jumbling...

But yeah, so we shared a conversation from fear of needles which initiated, not sure how? lol but it then continued on to sharing my surviving of cancer story, which till today still even surprises me just as much as it does the person listening. It's been about 7 years i guess, it was September 2002, and my gosh it seems like a dream to me honestly. My friend and I spoke of it being so unreal and the thought that in reality I wouldn't have been here today, talking about. But thank goodness I'm alive right? And the thought of it possibly being a mistake, being diagnosed with cancer or not, everything happens for a reason. And to tell you the truth a part of me is very thankful it did. I have had a lot of things in my life discipline me but I feel there is nothing stronger than a Life threatening situation. And this was mine. 

And i gotta admit, it initially didn't truly hit me on how much of an impact this would be in my life. I survived, I accepted it and I moved on. I know i probably should be spreading the good news a whole lot more than i have or ever did. But I told myself I'd want to write a book or a testimony to this. But It truly just hit me that it wasn't so much the Life threatening situation that just turned me around. Believe me it took awhile before I started to change my life around. Honestly I think i just went back into the groove of life. I mean, I was still in Highschool I truly still didnt know any better. 

I realize this sounds foolish on the person reading this' behalf, but truthfully I didn't feel absolutely changed. Like it wasn't a life changing event at that point just yet. I mean I realized I survived, and yet somehow I knew that I was meant to survive, because I remember I wasn't all that afraid going through this life changing event. What's even more interesting is that, at this point in life, when you're given this situation where quite honestly you could've possibly lived or died, simple as that; I did not yet really know God and his son Jesus Christ.

It wasn't till later on that I came to know him. Baptized Catholic and yet raised with no religious or catholic discipline, I've always had this hunger and thirst to know more about life, besides just existing. I wanted to understand everything, especially being surrounded with such unfortunate events in life, I had to have some kind of closure that I was made for more than this. 

So although this Cancer opened my eyes, it wasn't till later that I had a life changing revelation. And i have to tell you I've been convicted ever since. Although alot of times I feel this will always be a reminder of what is, I know that he'll always be by my side, as they say, God will never throw anything in which you can't handle. Bound for greatness, I feel so blessed to be alive today. And although I may not be living the worst life, or the best Christian life, i know that I still can change it and at least this time I know.

I'm so happy about this :)

and yes I still want to write a book. hehe God will help me with the time and words.